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Life is not perfect. No matter how hard we try, the to-do list is constantly being updated. People keep making mistakes and our ideal outcomes often miss the mark. It can be hard to be truly happy when things don’t go our way. By always thinking about what we want or don’t want, we can see our lives as imperfect and incomplete.
 
Instead, look for happiness in the imperfect. Sure, we might really want a Caribbean cruise and we surely don’t want the weight that always seems to be saddling our waists – but ask yourself:

• What really makes me happier? 
• What are some of the things I am happy about right now?
• Am I willing to reframe a negative opinion and look for positive opportunity?
• Do I readily share my happiness with others?

Life is not perfect, but it's also too short to not find happiness in the our imperfect world.

When you can feel the stress building up, practice some quick stress-relieving activities. Try one of these ideas the next time you feel tense:

1. While standing, legs slightly apart, swing your arms and body.
2. While laying down, stretch your arms as far above your head as you can and your feet as far away from your body as you can. Then relax. Repeat 5 times.
3. High step in place, as if you are in a marching band.
4. While sitting or standing, tense and release muscles (especially neck/shoulder, jaw, tummy, forehead, hands)
5. Find a comfortable position, close your eyes, and take several, slow, deep breaths. Inhale to a count of four, pause, then exhale to a count of four.

When it comes to turning a tough day around or shifting your attitude, nothing works faster, is easier and is more consistently successful, than gratitude. The trick is to remembering to pause, take a moment and actually do it. It’s not hard. Try it.

Pause, breathe, close your eyes (if that helps you focus), clear your mind, and ask yourself, “what am I grateful for right now?” Your first thoughts may be extremely simple, which is fine. If you can stay in this space for even a minute, your mind will easily expand to include things big and small. The actual thought responses are not as important as seeking the answer.

If you make gratitude a daily practice, it will begin to come naturally. When you genuinely feel grateful it also becomes easier to share your appreciations with others.

One of the major challenges of a blizzard is cabin fever and feeling isolated. The winter months with its veil of darkness is a wonderful time to rest more deeply, and it’s still important to stay connected.
 
We repeatedly receive feedback that one of the biggest take-aways from The Leadership Sanctuary is being connected to other leaders. It takes time and consciousness to stay connected, but as this month’s articles demonstrate—it’s vital and so worth the effort. Close your eyes and take a moment to imagine who you would like to connect with right now. Who have you been meaning to call? Make a point to connect with him/her either by phone or in person. Practice your listening skills and open up to a meaningful conversation. Enjoy being connected again.

Heroes to me are people who have created much good in this world as a result of horrible experiences in their lives. Some heroes are famous and some are everyday people. A few heroes who come to mind:

• Christopher Reeve, who created so much good as a result of his paralyzing accident
• Viktor Frankl, who created so much good out of his experience in a concentration camp
• Ram Dass, who created so much good as a result of his debilitating stroke
• Marc Klaas, who created so much good after the murder of his daughter

Post a photo or the name of a hero each week on you computer, and every day, think of a different trait that you respect them for. Thank them for showing you the trait, and say to yourself: "If they can learn and grow from their experiences, I certainly can learn and grow from mine!"

So much of our grief, suffering, and anger stems from wanting things to be different than they are. By un-setting your heart, you will let go of trying to control the things over which you have no control.

• Make a list of the things that are holding you back from “the perfect life.”
• Let go of each item by saying out loud, “I do not need _________ to fill my heart.”
• Shake, breathe out a sigh of relief and let your whole body release the need or control.
• Now breathe in a nurturing breath and open your heart to a more powerful way of living.

Dr. Andrew Weil developed The 4-7-8 (or Relaxing Breath) Exercise – and it is enormously effective. This can be done at anytime, anywhere, needs no equipment and will work immediately.

• Close your mouth and inhale quietly through your nose to a mental count of four.
• Hold your breath for a count of seven.
• Exhale completely through your mouth, making a whoosh sound to a count of eight.
• This is one breath. Now inhale again and repeat the cycle three more times for a total of four breaths.

We are back to work, kids back to school and starting another new year. Launch into the new year with your eyes open and your focus sharp. If you feel dazed by too many things to do try this short exercise:

• Close your eyes.
• Feel your feet. Wiggle and stretch them.
• Feel your hands. Open and close them.
• Feel your head. Move it side to side and forward and backward or even in circles.
• Feel your breath. In your nose and out through your mouth, maybe even let out a sigh.

When you have completed this sequence at least three times, open your eyes and look around. What do you notice? What are your sensations now?  How does your body feel? Has your focus changed?

As the year comes to a close, it's a terrific time to take stock. Reflect on what served you and what didn’t. What can you leave behind as you look ahead to 2016? In what ways did I limit myself and how might I change that in 2016? What would you like to bring into your life, what do you look forward to welcoming? What would bring you more joy, prosperity and serenity? What practices will support YOU in having the life you desire?

As you go through this process, are you able to choose to:

• See the opportunity to create something new
• Look for a new perspective you have not considered (sometimes this requires help from someone else)
• Learn from your experiences
• Find things to be grateful for everyday
• Treat others as you would want them to treat you
• Trust in your journey; it isn't all about the outcomes

Make choices that nourish you!

The real meaning of the season is heart-centered. We may get caught up in the commercial side and we know what really counts is the love we share. Thanks to the pressures at this time of year, we often find ourselves feeling exhausted, stressed out, or brimming over with anxiety. This exercise may offer you some relief.

• Place your hand on your chest over your heart
• Close your eyes
• Become aware of all the layers of your body that are covering your heart (skin, bone, muscle, etc.)
• Feel the pulsing beat of your heart and experience all the sensations it generates
• Focus your attention on your heart and what it is doing to nourish you and bring vitality to your body
• Picture the major influence your heart has on the systems of your body
• Rest in the power of your heart
• Take a deep breath and feel the tension melt away
• Pause for a moment of gratitude